Feel bad about eating too many Reeses? Well feel bad no more! The General Authorities have sanctioned them.David B. Haight: "Imagine 70 years ago on a rough road between Idaho and Logan. There were no Circle K's, no 7-11's. You had to bring your Peanut Butter Cups with you. Ruby and I split one for the first time in 1937 . . . "
Dallin H. Oaks: "The Reese's Peanut Butter Cup challenges us to consume. From the beginning there have been three steps in eating a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. First, remove the wrapper. This is best done quickly, by turning the cup over, grasping the outer fold and pulling away from the bottom. Second .. . "
Joseph B. Wirthlin: "When I was young I would sprint to the corner store, buy a Reese's and run my hand through my hair before taking it down in one bite. These days I don't sprint, and I have no hair, but the peanut butter cup remains."
Richard G. Scott: "If you have not eaten a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, I plead with you. Eat one now. Enjoy the chocolate, the peanut butter. Do not delay. If you have thought, "That's not for me," I plead with you to reconsider. Of all foods I treasure, this one was the first."
M. Russell Ballard: "The time has come when members of the church need to reach out to our friends and share a cup, a peanut butter cup. It is not enough to raise a chocolate bar; it must now have peanut butter."
Thomas S. Monson: "I remember I ate my first Reese's Peanut Butter Cup when I was a tender lad of eight. My mother came up to me, and with a loving twinkle in her eye, asked, 'Tommy, are you eating a Reese's?' And I would invariably smile up to her, 'Yes, Yes, I am.' 'But Tommy, did you know that Sister Jensen next door hasn't eaten a Reese's Cup in years?' My young mind thought upon the plight of my neighbor. Tears were shed. Hearts were gladdened. A cup was shared."
Boyd K. Packer: "In all my years, I have always eaten my Reese's Peanut Butter Cups the same way -- the established way we have been instructed to eat them. There is a far greater evil in this world, though -- those who believe they can eat their cups in a way unconventional to the time-honored manner. We must be true and faithful and eat our Reese's Peanut Butter Cups in the customary and recognized approach as it has been established."
Neal A. Maxwell: "I intentionally initiate the delicious design of deglutition of the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup by nibbling a negligible nit of the culinary creamy cavalcade. It is exclusively through small entities that the great things are fabricated."
J. Golden Kimball: "H*** Heber, I'll eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup any d*** way I want!"

1 comment:
For reals, Dan. Where did you uncover this? I can't imagine this kind of stuff is just out there floating around on the world wide web.
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